The dream I had on New Year’s Eve
Contained some scenes you won’t believe
That even I found hard to watch –
I put it down to too much scotch.
The year was 2025
Prince Charles not only was alive
But was at long, long last the King
And quite fixated on one thing.
“I’ve had enough of dreary grey;
Let’s brighten up the whole UK!
I want three million tonnes of paint
That I will use without constraint.”
Patriotic you’d have said:
He ordered blue and white and red.
However it would swiftly seem
His was a different colour scheme.
Those cinemas where people view
Erotic films he painted blue
With vim and vigour, didn’t stop
Until he’d used up every drop.
But when that little chore was fixed
The red and white he promptly mixed
And used to spray all private cars;
All minis, Bentleys, Jaguars
Fiat, Porsche, Mercedes-Benz –
A list, in fact, that never ends.
And as these vats of paint were stirred
By order of King Charles III
There was a word of explanation:
“I do so like a pink carnation.”
